Thursday, March 02, 2006

I Don't Know How to Quit You


We have the latest example of the unabashed man love that takes place in the press over J.J. Redick. Gregg Doyel of CBS Sportsline has these fine words to share with us:

"I like J.J. Redick. Actually, that's not strong enough. Not nearly so. I don't just like J.J. Redick. I like dolphins. I like $12 appetizers. I'm in love with J.J. Redick...Redick, is my favorite player in nine years as a college basketball writer. I'm allowed to have a favorite, you know."

Okay, so he's got some sort of major man crush on Redick, but that shouldn't cloud his judgment as an objective writer, right? Wrong, wrong! Here's what he said later:

"He's good, J.J. Redick. He's better than anyone you've ever seen in college basketball. Probably better than anyone you will see in the future."

Wow, Gregg not only decided that Redick is the not only the greatest player that we've ever seen, he's the greatest that we'll ever see. Don't you think this greatest player of all time could at least lead the nation in scoring. I mean since shooting is all that he does? As far as I know, he's second to Adam Morrison. Don't you think the greatest player of all time should be able to do more than score? What about rebounding or passing or defense? I guess to Gregg these are minor points of the game. Sorry Oscar, Jerry, Larry, Magic, Michael, you guys were wasting your time with that other stuff. Love is apparently blind and stupid.

Here's his closing line:

"One day I'll tell my kids I saw the greatest shooter in college basketball history"

I think I'm going to cry. Well, cry or go and beat the shit out of Gregg Doyel. He could tell his kids that he saw the greatest shooter in history and he could also tell them that pigs fly out of his ass every half an hour, but neither of those statements would be true (actually I don't know about the pigs, but I'm not going to do any follow up on that one). I don't have to go that far back in history to find Ray Allen, Glen Rice, Chris Jackson, Chris Mullin or Dennis Scott, any of whom I would take over Redick. He bases this "greatest shooter" label on the fact that Reddick has more 3 pointers than anyone else in the history of College Basketball. That is true, but what he doesn't tell you is that the greatest shooters from the past didn't have a 3 point line to shoot from. Pete Maravich averaged 44 points a game for his career without the benefit of a 3 point line. How many 3 pointers do you think he would have had? Jerry West, Larry Bird, Bill Bradley? The number would have been well beyond Redick's reach.

It's this kind of shortsighted analysis that gives sports writers a bad name. I guess if he wasn't this asinine, I wouldn't have had anything to write about today, so I should be grateful. Thanks Gregg Doyel. You really deserve my first annual "I don't think Brokeback Mountain went far enough" award. Congratulations!

There's a poll attached to the is article that asks if Redick is the greatest player of all time. The saddest part of this whole fiasco is not that this idiotic poll was included, but that 31% of the respondents said yes. I'm really worried about the future of this country.

By the way, if you care to see this trash, here's the link: http://cbs.sportsline.com/collegebasketball/story/9274126

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