You Mean There's No F*@king Easter Bunny Either?

BREAKING NEWS:
An about-to-be-released book claims that Barry Bonds started taking steroids in 1998 because he was jealous of the attention that Mark McGwire had gotten by breaking the home run record. The book also claims that he worked with the BALCO owner and his trainer to design a regimen that would avoid detection and increase his muscle mass.

Wow, Barry Bonds on steriods and Human Growth Hormone after he denied ever knowingly taking anything. God damn it! I can't believe in anything anymore!