Monday, November 19, 2007

Blue Monday

Let's see how the SM fared this weekend, shall we?

Baltimore +3

A push is not exactly a great start, but at least it's not a loss. I still have confidence that this will be a great week. SM 0-0.
Atlanta +3

Okay, maybe this won't be such a great week. Atlanta apparently forgot that they were supposed to show up play football this weekend. Seven is a great number for a baseball team. I'm sure they were confused by the large men in pads and helmets that kept on tackling them as they tried to round the bases. SM 0-1.

Miami +10

Another push. I really have to find spreads with 1/2 points. This is just getting ridiculous. SM 0-1.
Carolina +10

The Panthers did not cover the spread. This is looking more and more dire. 2 losses and 2 pushes. I'm beginning to doubt the SM. Has the all knowing, all seeing SM finally met it's match? Stay tuned boys and girls. SM 0-2.
Houston +1

Finally. The Texans of all teams come through. This was basically a pick 'em game, so the SM is finally starting to show it's true worth. SM 1-2.

Arizona +3.5

How about Arizona bringing us back to .500. Having the Texans and the Cardinals not only cover the spread, but bring home victories must be a first. I'm not going to do the research to back up that claim, but if you have the time, feel free to waste it looking that up. SM 2-2.
Detroit +3

The Lions at home seemed like a good bet. Their fans were actually beginning to believe that they might be on the verge of a turnaround in Motown, but alas, they still suck. SM 2-3.

Kansas City +14.5

The Chiefs fought the good fight and managed to lose by a respectable three points. The Colts are a shell of their former super bowl winning selves and until they get healthy, it's going to be a dog fight every weekend for them. SM 3-3.
San Diego +3

What the hell happened to the Chargers? Didn't they go 14-2 last year? Wasn't LT unstoppable last year? Didn't they have the same personnel coming back this year? I guess they miss old Marty in SD now. Sorry about this one Wayne. SM 3-4.
Oakland +5.5

The Raiders couldn't cover the spread even with the fact that the league's leading rusher was out for the Vikings. They are on my naughty list now. They are definitely not getting anything for Christmas. SM 3-5.
NY Jets +9.5

The Jets shocked the world and themselves by going beating the Steelers. This one was certainly unexpected. The Jets have a constant inferiority complex because their home stadium is named after another team, plus they are always playing second fiddle to that other team. It's not a coincidence that their name rhymes with the other team that plays second fiddle in this town. But hey, a win is a win. SM 4-5.

Chicago +5.5

The Bears must have spent the off season partying with the Chargers. Either that or they are eating too much of the pizza in Chicago. Second City, my ass. SM 4-6.
San Francisco +3

The 49ers lost by four just to piss me off. I hate San Francisco. I've never been, but I hate it anyway. I know that doesn't make any sense, but I'm a bitter, old man. SM 4-7.
Washington +10.5

The Cowboys won and that's really all that matters. Toby was at this game and I'm pretty sure she spent most of the game cursing. She's still mad about a Monday Night game from two seasons ago when the Redskins won on a last second play and proceeded to celebrate as if they'd won the super bowl. Hopefully she returned the favor this weekend. SM 5-7.
Buffalo +14.5

New England absolutely dismantled the Bills. This would have been a loss even if the spread was 45! The Bills should have stayed in bed and sent a high school team in their place. They couldn't have done worse. SM 5-8.


That's it. A bad week for the usually dependable SM. Well, as a great man once said, "life ain't easy and life ain't free". Yeah, I didn't understand it either.

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