Quick Pick

I know I’ve been remiss in my duties here these past few weeks, but I’m getting back on that horse starting now.

First, my pick for tonight’s game. My heart says Cincinnati, but my head is kind of leaning towards Baltimore. Head is not totally convinced yet, so let’s go with the Bengals.

Second, have you all seen that insane picture of Michael Strahan freaking out in the Giants locker room? Per usual, he’s blaming somebody else for something (though not Brett Favre for taking the dive that left Strahan with a tainted record, but I digress). His eyes are big and crazy and he’s yelling at a girl. That picture is the best thing to be found in the Times today. That's it! Thanks for posting MYCUE.

Third, Jason the quadriplegic quarterback on Friday Night Lights has finally discovered that his best friend, foxy Tim, has been sleeping with his girlfriend, bad actress Lyla. It’s about time. Hopefully this will give us many scenes of Tim looking remorseful and ever so dreamy, and Lyla can, I don’t know, kill herself or something so Tyra the blond can get more screen time. She’s too cool and way too hot to be sitting on the sideline. If anyone should be banging both Jason and Tim, it’s her.

Picks for the rest of this weekend’s games to come…

The House of the Rising Sun

The Yankees went out and got themselves a Japanese pitcher yesterday, it just wasn't the one they originally wanted. The Yankees posted the highest bid for the right negotiate with Kei Igawa from the Hanshin Tigers. The winning bid was just north of $26 million dollars. It's just an example of how inflated the prices for pitching has gotten these days. Before the Matsuzaka bonanza, Igawa figured to go for somewhere in the $10-$12 million range, but with mediocre pitching being rewarded like never before, the price ballooned to over $25 million.

Igawa has a pretty decent record in the Japanese leagues. He's led the league in strikeouts three times and was the winner of the league MVP and the equivalent of the Cy Young award three years ago when he finished with a 20-5 record. His numbers are somewhat deceptive however. Despite the strikeouts, he is not a hard thrower. His best pitch is his changeup and his fastball breaks the 90 MPH barrier only occasionally. He is basically the definition of a finesse pitcher. The Yankees have had experience with a Japanese pitcher before and it was not exactly pleasant. Hideki Irabu was hailed as the Japanese Nolan Ryan before coming to the Yankees. He was supposed to throw in the uppper 90's and have a 90 MPH splitter. Unfortunately for the Yankees, neither of those things turned out to be true. Irabu pitched well against bad teams, but did not perform very well against against good teams. In his three years with the Yankees he only pitched in one post season game.

Igawa doesn't come with the fanfare or expectations of either Irabu or Matsuzaka. I'm pretty sure his team is absolutely shocked at the amount of money they got from the Yankees. The Yankees are thinking that it will take about $5 million a year for three years in order to get a contract done. Even at those bargain basement prices in today's insane market, the deal will still end up costing the Yankees about $40 million over 3 years. Of course they will hold Igawa's major league rights for 6 years before he can become a free agent, so the $26 million works out to a little over over $4 million a year over that period. The posting money does not count against the salary cap and so signing a pitcher for $5 million a year does make economic sense. The pitchers that are still available on the market are a collection of has beens and never was players. Ted Lily is a career .500 pitcher, Barry Zito has a record of 55-46 since his Cy Young award in 2002. Gil Meche has a career record of 55-44 and has a career ERA of 4.65. The best pitcher available is probably Jason Schmidt, but he is going to turn 34 in January and it's very clear that his best years are behind him, plus he has a history of arm trouble.

So what can the Yankees expect from Igawa? It's hard to say. He has a good 3:1 K to walk ratio. It's clear that he has had decent success in his career with a winning percentage of almost .600. He knows how to pitch, but how that will translate to the major leagues is anyone's guess. He recently pitched against a team of major league all stars and did not fare very well. He had been off for a month and as a finesse pitcher who probably needs regular work to stay sharp, the six walks he issued were probably indicative of his lack of recent activity. The scouts are saying that he projects as a back of the end starter, meaning a four or a five starter. If he signs for the projected $4 - $5 million a year, then he could turn out to be a bargain. Of course if he can't handle the majors then it would turn into a colossal waste of money. But as we've seen in the past, the Yankees aren't opposed to that.

One Big Happy Family

Stephon Marbury got his wish this offseason. His friend and confidant Isiah Thomas took over as head coach of the Knicks. It supposed to be peaches and cream for Starbury this year, but it instead looks like the beginning of the end of a beautiful relationship.

Marbury didn't even attempt a shot in the Knicks last game and his offensive output has been anemic this year. Isiah has resorted to benching him for large stretches of the game as the second unit attempts to pull the Knicks out of the mess that the first unit has created. Marbury is now openly sulking on the bench and refusing to acknowledge his teammates efforts on the court when he is not in the game. This is the kind of situation that Isiah was supposed to be able to avoid. One of the reasons that the Knicks gave for firing Larry Brown was because he didn't communicate with his players. Isiah is now getting a taste of what Brown had to deal with last year. Overpaid, underproducing malcontents who refuse to bend to the will of the coach, even for the good of the team.

How is Isiah going to react to this situation? Well, he has started talking in the press, but it has yet to reach the open levels of warfare that the Brown-Marbury situation reached last year. I'm sure it's just a matter of time before they are bad mouthing each other openly in the press. Marbury was supposed to have free reign this year. This was supposed to be his team. However, the starting five has been lackluster to say the least. They lack energy and creativity. Marbury has watched from the bench as the 2nd unit, led by Jamal Crawford, David Lee and Nate Robinson have played the kind of uptempo, high energy style that is supposed to be a Marbury trademark. Isiah has insisted on starting him with Steve Francis in the backcourt, which has to be one of the most mismatched starting guard combos of all time. I have no idea why Isiah thinks that they can work together on the court. Marbury is the kind of player who needs to have the ball in his hands in order to be effective. Francis is much the same way. Marbury will at least pass the ball once in a while, Francis is a black hole on offense. Balls come his way and he will proceed to dribble until there are a few seconds left on the shot clock and then fire up an off balance, ill-conceived shot. This experiment has already proved to be a disaster. It's clear that neither player knows what his role is supposed to be and if they do know what their roles are, they are refusing to play them.

James Dolan is the kind of person who thinks that throwing money at a situation will fix it. In the case of Starbury that is partially true. I'm sure once this situation gets a little more out of hand, the Knicks will do everything within their power to trade him. I'm think that eventually they may just have to buy out the remainder of his contract and let him walk. The knicks are clearly not going to get any better with him as a member of the team. If he were benched, I'm fairly sure that he would do his level best to sow the seed of discontent among his teammmates. Francis also has to go. If the Knicks are to improve, they must develop the kind of team mentality that Francis and Marbury are apparently unwilling or unable to develop. They are "me" first players. That will not work in the kind of system that Isiah and Larry Brown for that matter, tried to bring to the team. Also neither of them are the kind of players who can carry a team on his back. Hell if Kevin Garnett can't do it, they sure as hell can't, and he's twice the player that they are.

Isiah supposed has a year to show improvement in this team. If he insists on starting Marbury and Francis then the Knicks will be in the same situation they were last year. The young players are more than willing to provide the team with maximum effort when they are on the floor. They actually seem to be enjoying themselves when they are playing. Marbury and Francis look like they are playing out a death sentence and that is exactly what they will doom the Knicks to if they are given the majority of playing time in the backcourt. As the saying goes, "be careful of what you wish for, because you just might get it". Welcome to the Knicks 2006 season. You can check out, but you can never leave.

2nd Place Receives Set of Steak Knives

As you know by now, Derek Jeter did not win the AL MVP. I personally think that he was the most valuable player in the league this year, but apparently the MVP voters did not agree. It's not a travesty that Jeter didn't win, but Justin Morneau wasn't even the most valuable player on his own team. I guess the RBI totals were just too much for the voters to ignore. Morneau did drive in 30 more runs than Jeter and hit .323 with runners in scoring position. Of course if the writers had looked a little further into the stats they would have seen that Jeter led the league with a .381 batting average with runners in scoring position. So Morneau's lead in RBI's was a function of opportunity, not better hitting. Jeter also led the league in VORP, Runs Created and Win Shares. Morneau led the league in exactly nothing.

Jeter will probably never be in a position again to win the MVP award in his career and he never seems to able to win that elusive batting title either. I'm sure Jeter is really broken up about it too. All he gets to do is play shortstop for the most famous team on earth and get paid a ridiculous sum of money for it and date beautiful women. I mean Justin Morneau won the MVP award and all Derek got to do was spend last weekend with Jessica Biel. God, it must be really hard for him to go through the rest of his life knowing that he didn't win the 2006 AL MVP award. I feel sorry for the poor guy.

Yippee Ki Yay, Motherf*****

The Cowboys moved into a tie for the NFC east lead this weekend with a win over the previously undefeated Colts and a loss by the suddenly struggling Giants. The Giants who seemed on their way to the Superbowl a couple of weeks ago are suddenly playing like a team that has lost it's way. They Cowboys who looked like they were on their way to another mediocre season have turned into real playoff contenders over the past four weeks. The Giants have had a number of injuries that have led to their sudden downturn in play and Eli Manning is playing more like the son of Phil Simms than the son of Archie Manning.

It's easy to pinpoint the moment the Cowboys season turned around. It was when Parcells finally decided to insert Tony Romo into the starting lineup and relegate Drew Bledsoe to clipboard duty. Romo took over after halftime of an eventual loss to the Giants, but he has gone 3-1 since then. In fact the only loss the Cowboys suffered was to the Redskins in a game that they should have won. Romo has been steady but not spectacular as the starting QB. His QB rating is sitting at 100 for the season, which is just a half a point behind Peyton Manning for tops in the league (Bledsoe's QB rating was 69 before he got benched). The best part about his play so far is that he has been able to avoid the kind of game killing mistakes that Bledsoe seemed to be so fond of. He has thrown eight TD passes and five interceptions, but his mistakes have not been of the kind that determined the outcome of the game.

Romo has shown displayed exceptional control for someone who was thrust into the spotlight as the starting QB for "America's Team". His ability to avoid the rush and maintain his composure under pressure have already made him a favorite with his teammates. There was even a rumor that he was dating Jessica Simpson. This all comes with being successful as the Dallas Cowboys QB. If he manages to get the Cowboys deep into the playoffs this year, he will be well on his way to becoming a Texas legend. The Cowboys have been searching for a replacement for Troy Aikman for a long time and amazing as it may seem, they may just have found him in an undrafted QB from Eastern Illinois. Of course being the QB for the Cowboys has it's downside as well. It won't take much more than one bad outing for the fans to start waxing poetic about and longing for a return to Bledsoe. It is one of the risks of leading the team with the highest profile in football.

I don't really think that Parcells would change QB's again. Barring injury or a complete and total collapse, Romo has the job for the rest of the year. It will be interesting to see how far he can carry this team. In a year where there certainly doesn't seem to be any unbeatable teams, the Cowboys might have a chance to make a serious playoff push. It's seems like it's been at least a decade since the Cowboys have even won a playoff game. Perhaps that will change this year. I know that would make Toby happy. It's been a long time since she's has a QB in Dallas to look up to. And while no one will ever replace #8 in her heart, perhaps #9 will be a worthy successor on the field.

Steve Austin Needs an Upgrade

Remember when $6 million dollars seemed like a lot of money? Steve Austin was a man barely alive and it took a whole $6 million to put him back together. We should have an army of bionic men and women by now if the going price is that cheap. The Red Sox just spent $51.1 million for the rights to negotiate with Matsuzaka. That money goes directly to his team in Japan, and given that his contract is probably going to be in at least the $12-14 million dollar a year range, The Red Sox are looking at a figure approaching if not exceeding $100 million dollars. Couldn't they just get a bunch of bionic men for that money. I mean even given inflation, A Steve Austin would cost what? $20-30 million? Maybe $40 million. I think the money is better spent on half-man, half-machine super beings. But then again, that's just me.

Congratulations go out to the Red Sox. Hopefully they don't have another "fat, pussy toad" on their hands.

Movin' N Groovin'

Brian Cashman and the Yankees braintrust have begun their offseason moves and so far it looks like the beginnings of a youth movement. The Yankees shipped Gary Sheffield and all of his bitching and moaning off to Detroit for three young pitchers. And they also sent Jaret Wright to Baltimore in return for another young reliever. I'm very sure that this is going to be a busy offseason for the GM and that this is just the beginning.

The Yankees have apparently lost out to the Red Sox in their bid to land Matsuzaka from Japan. The Red Sox bid a reported $42 million in order to secure the rights to negotiate a contract with the right handed gyroball throwing ace. It seems like an insane amount of money considering the contract that will be required to land him. The deal will almost certainly end up costing the Red Sox somewhere north of $100 million. They feel that getting a foothold in Japan will help them with their marketing and also they have a great need for front line pitching and felt that he was worth the potential investment. I am patiently awaiting the columns condemning the Red Sox for spending that kind of money. I know that if the Yankees had won the bidding the press would have been lining up to bemoan the fact that the Yankees are the only team that could afford to spend that kind of cash and how it's a shame that no one else can compete with them. I'm waiting.

The Yankees starting staff is a little depleted. With both Randy Johnson and Carl Pavano question marks heading into next years spring training, the Yankees only have Wang and Mussina penciled into the starting rotation. They will probably be big players in a very shallow field of available free agent starters. Barry Zito is the biggest prize remaining, but he is probably going to command a huge number to get him on board. I personally don't think he's worth it. His K/BB ratio has been going down for years and outside of the first two years of his career, he has basically been a .500 pitcher. It seems like a stretch for me to think that they Yankees would invest $75 million+ for a pitcher with those kinds of numbers. The Yankees are going to have to get creative in order to fill out the staff, but I have no doubt that Cashman will get it done. The Yankees certainly have options within the organization as both Jeff Karstens and Darell Rasner showed themselves to be servicable major leaguers down the stretch this year. And there is alway the looming shadow of Phillip Hughes who may be up with the club as early as mid season.

The Yankees have freed up some salary at this point. They are going to resign Mussina for about $6 million less than they were due to pay him under his previous contract and trading Sheffield saves them another $13 million. Various other expiring contracts puts them about $23 million under what they spent last year. They clearly don't need another bat in the lineup, although some right handed power might serve them well now that they don't have Sheffield to balance out the lineup. The key is going to be pitching. Since they most likely won't be able to get a #1 starter, they are going to have look for pitchers who can give them quality innings. The offense is still plenty potent enough to score 900+ runs, so the pitching does not have to be the best in the league. You really just never know what you're going to get out of people. Look at Aaron Small for example. Two years ago he comes out of nowhere to post a 10-0 record with a 3.20 ERA and basically saved the Yankees season. Last year he goes 0-3 with an ERA over eight. It's really just impossible to tell what's going to happen until the pitchers get out there on the mound. Kenny Rogers and Jeff Weaver are also prime examples of that.

I'm sure that Cash is not happy about losing out to the Red Sox, but hopefully he'll be able to make do with what's available. I have complete faith that come April the Yankees will field a team that is more than capable of winning the World Series. Of course they've done that for the past six years and haven't won but tomorrow is a new day and hope springs eternal (although, to tell you the truth, I wouldn't mind seeing the Padres win, if the Yankees don't).

Why is This Man Smiling?

Sammy Sosa had some interesting things to say about the steroid claims made against him. Sammy apparently would like to come back and play in the majors in the '07 and as a precursor to that he wants to make sure that everyone knows he's always been clean. Here's his first quote:

"I am clean, and I always have been clean. There has been a lot of speculation, but they don't have no evidence. So you take it from there. They haven't been writing a book about me doing this or doing that."

So Sammy is basically saying that because there is no evidence against him, he must be clean. I guess there is no actual evidence, but there is a hell of a lot of circumstantial evidence. People have been sent to the electric chair for less.

Here is what Sammy had to say about not being named by Jason Grimsley (who supposedly implicated Roger Clemens, Andy Pettitte, Miguel Tejada, Brian Roberts and Jay Gibbons in a federal probe) as a user of steroids:

"My name would have been in there. Think about it. All of the questions and all the speculation, my name is never there. Yeah, everyone is surprised because, you know why? I hit 60 [homers] three times. I put up the numbers."

Of course all the people named by Grimsley were actual teammates of his, which Sammy never was. Apparently Sammy doesn't think that makes much of a difference.

And here is Sammy's explanation for his sudden increase in power:

"I put up those numbers by going to bed at 9 o'clock at night in Chicago because I have to play a day game every day at 1 o'clock. I prepared myself for that."

So according to Sammy it was clean living was responsible for Sammy's prodigious home run output and not performance enhancing drugs. Wow, if you believe that one, I have a bridge that I have for sale in NY. It's a little old, but it's in great condition.

Sammy also has some thoughts about his Hall of Fame chances:

"The Hall of Fame means everything, and I think my way to the Hall of Fame is there. There has been a lot of [steroid use] speculation. But I don't think that speculation is going to stop me from going to the Hall. And remember, I always treated all of the writers great. I always had time for everybody. I am not saying that's why they should vote for me. [They should vote for me] because the numbers, they are there. That thing don't lie."

Sammy treated the writers well. Good for him. I'm sure they'll remember that when it comes time to vote. Of course the writers do actually remember things like that. Case in point Albert Belle who was a complete ass to everyone around him and had a special dislike of writers. He barely registered when his name came up on the ballot. Kirby Puckett on the other hand was always accommodating and was voted in on the first ballot even though his numbers aren't as impressive as Belle's.

It will be interesting to see if any team is willing to pick up Sammy for the upcoming season. My guess is that no one will do it, but I've been wrong before. The best thing that Sammy could do is to lay low until his HOF class comes up. It's four years down the road and by then the steroids uproar may have died down. Knowing Sammy though, he'll probably be unable to resist the urge to make stupid statements from time to time.

Down and Out

The Knick bandwagon is just about to start rolling. Four games (and three losses)into the season is apparently enough to turn Isaih into Larry Brown. He is already berating his players for lack of effort and while he hasn't yet resorted to all out warfare in the press, I'm sure that's just one more lackadasical performance away. Isiah has already said that he's willing to bench anyone who doesn't perform well. According to the coach, he has no favorites. I'm sure that's news to Stephon Marbury, who was sure that he was Isaih's favorite.

The Knicks defense has been non existent this year. They have given up over 100 points in all four of their games this year. If not for a few missed free throws by Memphis on opening night, they could well be 0-4. Scoring may be about talent, but defense is about effort. They are clearly not giving the effort that is required on the defensive end. And the finger has to be squarely pointed at the coach. David Lee continues to be a rebounding machine when he's in the game and Nate Robinson provides a lot of enthusiasm off the bench, but Marbury, Francis and Curry have been disappointing to say the least. I can't take credit for this but I will repeat it, a writer in NY said that Curry was the only person to ever gain weight during a game. Apparently he's stuffing his face during timeouts. He just seems uninterested for large stretches of the game. A lot of that is due to the fact that he never touches the ball for long stretches because one of the Knicks 24 guards is firing up a jump shot from 30 feet.

It's going to be a long season and there's nothing that Isiah can do about it. I guess he could get fired, but I don't think there's a coach or GM that can turn this situation around in the immediate future. I'm looking forward to the game in Denver tonight. I'm interested to see if Isiah starts the usual suspects or acutally tries to mix things up. I don't see how it can be any worse than what he has already put out on the court this season.

King For a Day

The Colts beat the Patriots in Foxborough (or wherever the hell they play these days) to remain unbeaten. And Peyton Manning scored a victory over his personal rival (Tom Brady) for label as the "best QB in the NFL". Manning has played Wilt chamberlain to Brady's Bill Russell for the past five years. Manning has the stats, but Brady has the championships. With the victory last night though, for today Manning is the best QB in the league. He has worn that label for a few years now, however there is always a big "but" when it comes to Manning. The "but" with Manning is that his teams have failed to advance to the Superbowl. It is true that in football especially, one player cannot singlehandedly take a team to a championship, but that hasn't stopped the criticism from coming Manning's way.

The Colts started last season with 13 consecutive wins. There were threatening to complete the first undefeated season since the '73 Dolphins. The coaching staff decided that going into the playoffs rested and healthy was more important than finishing the season undefeated. They took their foot off the gas pedal and the Colts did not finish undefeated and went on to lose to the eventual champion, the Steelers. The Colts seemed poised to win the Superbowl last year but they didn't and the finger of blame for the failure to do so, was pointed squarely at Peyton Manning. The feeling is that he is in danger of being labeled as this generations Dan Marino. He has put up record breaking numbers and is on pace to own every record in the book, but has yet to lead his team to a championship. In his second season, Marino did get a team to the Superbowl but they were crushed by the San Francisco 49ers. During that season Marino set the record for TD passes (since broken by Manning) and yards (which he still holds), but the Dolphins were simply beaten by the better team that day. Marino was never able to get the Dolphins back to the big game after that season. The team never had a solid running game (he only one 1,000 yard rusher for the rest of his career) and relied on Marino's arm to win every game. The fact that he was as successful as he was (second only to Elway in wins as a starting QB) is a testament to his abilities. However, Marino is defined not only by his phenomenal passing numbers, but also by his inability to win a Superbowl. Manning has had a good running attack for the majority of his career. He has also had a future hall of famer in Marvin Harrison to throw to. The Colts weakness has always been their defense. It hasn't been horrible, but they have never had the kind of dominating defense that can shut down an opponent in the playoffs. The truth is also that Manning has also seemed to come up small in some very big games.

Tom Brady has never put up the kind of stats that Manning has. He has very good numbers but certainly not the kind of individual stats that would place among the all time greats. However he does have something that Peyton Manning would kill for, three Superbowl victories. He has been the MVP of two of those victories and he has the reputation of being this generations Joe Montana. However, Montana had a group of hall of famers as teammates, which Brady does not. I can't think of one player on the Patriots team, with the exception of Brady, who is a sure-fire hall of famer. Montana had a "genius" head coach in Bill Walsh as Brady does in Bill Belichick. The credit for the Patriots success seems to be credited more to the coaches brain that it does the QB's arm. I'm not sure why that is. During the glory days in San Francisco, Montana and Walsh shared credit equally. Perhaps Brady isn't as flashy as Joe Montana was or perhaps he is just more low key and willing to share the credit more, but while he has gotten a few individual accolades, the credit seems more centered around the team and the coach than the player. I'm sure Brady doesn't mind at all as long as the team keeps winning. In fact the balanced attack and excellent defensive schemes in the playoffs are the reasons that the Patriots have won as much as they have. In my opinion, the underlying belief is that Brady isn't the kind of QB who can carry a team on his back (although he has never had the need to). Unlike say a Brett Favre, who has gotten much more individual attention, while leading his team to only one championship.

Manning is on the top of the heap of current NFL QB's. His regular season numbers are staggering. He is on pace to finish his career with 500 TD's and 60,000 yards. His greatness is unquestioned. What is questioned is his leadership ability. Manning will end up in the Hall of fame, and he is the unquestioned leader of the Colts. However, his legacy is undoubtedly going to end up being defined by how far he can take this team in the playoffs. Perhaps he will be like John Elway, who was labeled as "unable to win the big one", until Denver got a running game and he ended his career with two straight Superbowl victories. Seemingly overnight, Elway went from a choker to the ultimate winner. In the public's mind, all his past failures were forgotten. The same can happen to Peyton Manning. He has the talent and the team to make that happen. Until he does though, the best QB in the league label that he carries will continue to come with a big "but".

Week 9: Better late...

Apologies for the late posting. Technical difficulties left me without internet access entirely. No e-mail. Nothing. Like the pilgrims. On to the picks: Holy hell, was this ever a bad weekend for me.

St. Louis (-3) Kansas City
The battle for Missouri. St. Louis loves baseball more than football, and I expect fans there, still giddy over the World Series win, will carry the Rams on Sunday. Apparently there’s only room for one winner in St. Louis.

Baltimore (-3) Cincinnati
Ravens are living on the edge. That is my excuse this week for picking Cincinnati. Go Bengals! (Hi Dad!) Sorry Dad.

NY Giants (-13) Houston
I’m torn on this game. If the line were set at 9, I’d have no problem picking the Giants. As it is, I just can’t take them to win by 13. Not yet. A brief flicker of light in the middle of one long exercise in futility.

Jacksonville (-10) Tennessee
How do you solve a problem like Jacksonville? Until they prove to be consistent at something, I can’t trust them as ten point favorites. Jacksonville has officially become my college boyfriend. Or more accurately, this boy I kind of dated in college. One weekend he was all that I could have hoped for in the first guy I went out with when I no longer had a curfew. He was cute, funny, smart, and had a steady stream of cash coming in from his parents. The next weekend, he was blowing me off to get wasted with a gaggle of nimrods who lived on the second floor of his dorm. Sometimes he’d show up in the middle of the night for what I assumed was sex, but most often ended with him throwing up in my shower before passing out on the floor of my bathroom. The good times rocked; the bad time, not so much. Jacksonville, you are officially that guy. You’re not worth sticking with over the long haul, but sometimes, when you wash the vomit out of your hair, clean my bathroom, and spring for chocolate chip pancakes, you make it hard to let go.

Dallas (-3) Washington
Did we all watch Friday Night Lights this week? Tony Romo is our Matt Saracen. He played like a champ in his first game, and as such he totally deserves to hook up with the Coach Taylor’s daughter. And this week he’s playing our crosstown rivals, who are comprised entirely of juvenile delinquents who beat up little boys and throw bricks through young girls’ windows.

You know how much I hate Philly? Multiply that by 1000, and it’s close to how much I hate Washington. If you cheer for them, you’re a bad person. There’s no way around it. Well. What can I say about this? Apparently whatever higher power overseas sporting events decided to smile down on the team with the racist mascot. We were just out-coached on this one. After Washington failed to score from like the six inch line (having had SEVEN tries to do so), and we were pinned all the way back inside our own one yard line, Marion Barber should have been the back in for us. He’s the power runner, not Julius Jones. And what, what, what the fuck with all these penalties? That is a matter of discipline, and that is the fault of the coaching staff.

And don’t even get me started on TO’s dropped pass. "If you can touch it, you can catch it," is just another sports cliche at this point, but seriously, how do you make that pass easier to catch? Should Tony Romo has ran up alongside Terrell, and handed him the ball in a decorative gift bag?

I can, however, think of two good things about this game. First, Romo continues to impress. Second, I am successfully molding my previously football apathetic friend Buffy into a Dallas fan. She came out to watch the game with me (third time this year!), and at the end said, "Wow. That really kind of hurts. I’m upset by this!" Hurray for Buffy! You’re practically one of us now!

Buffalo (-3) Green Bay
Green Bay is good enough to beat a team that sucks this much. Obviously Green Bay is not good enough to beat a team that sucks this much.

New Orleans (-1) Tampa Bay
It’s safe to stop picking New Orleans, so I guess I shall. Tampa Bay was barely edged out by the Saints in Week 5, so I expect playing at home to make up for the difference here. Don’t tease me New Orleans! Don’t be Jacksonville!

Atlanta (-5) Detroit
Dun dun dun. My bullshit pick of the week. I like Detroit here. I know I’ve been consistently underrating Atlanta, but this week I expect that to pay off for me. Impressive, no? Two of my three BS picks so far this year have come through. This is not a trend to be ignored. I’m giving myself two points for this.

Chicago (-13.5) Miami
Too cold for the Dolphins. Shut up, you didn't pick this one either.

Minnesota (-5.5) San Francisco
I don’t care at all, so I’m taking San Francisco for my college roommate (Hi Katie!). I'm betting you didn't pick this one either. But I did. Huzzahs for me and Katie!

San Diego (-12.5) Cleveland
No reason not to take the Chargers at home. It was a hard weekend for me, so I’m going to console myself by taking half a point for this one.

Pittsburgh (-2) Denver
If the Steelers lose this game, their season is over. The Steelers' season is over.

New England (-3) Indianapolis
There is no reason for Indianapolis to lose this game. Of course, they will. How many Peyton Manning ads do you think we’ll see per commercial break? I can’t wait until they show the one of him in the moustache bragging about himself. I’m hoping it’s right after he throws his first interception. My esteemed colleague writes about Peyton Manning above, and you should check that out. While not part of the cult of Marino, I tend to have an easier time forgiving him his playoff losses than I do Peyton Manning. Primarily because Manning is for all intents and purposes the offensive coordinator of the Indianapolis Colts. Absolutely everything concerning the offense flows through him to a degree that I’ve never seen happen on another football team. Hell, even Montana, Mariono and Elway had plays called in from the sideline, at least occasionally. As a result of this power structure, when Peyton has a bad game the entire offense it out of luck because there is no way to compensate for him. Admittedly, this doesn’t happen often. In the regular season. In the playoffs, it happens all the time. You can talk about defense all you want, but during the post-season he is the one constant in Indianapolis’s failures.

Congratulations to him for getting this particular monkey off his back. It was a tough thing to do, and he played well. But I’m still going to need to see it in January.

Seattle (-8) Oakland
This game sucks. Seahawks. Is it too late to change my pick here?

Ouch. 4.5 out of 13 this week. And that's a pretty generous tally. Must retreat and regroup.

The Once and Future King

The Yankees quietly (well as quietly as they can do anything) replaced Lee Mazzili as bench coach with Don Mattingly. This move can be seen as a practical anointing of Mattingly as Joe Torre's successor as manager of the Yankees. Donnie Baseball is now widely perceived as the man who will assume the reigns of the Yankees once Joe calls it quits. Joe is in the last year of his contract, he's pushing 70 and while I'm sure he likes the $8 million a year that he receives from the Yankees, at some point he's going to want to spend some more time at home with his young children. He also may not have a choice. If the Yankees experience another post season flameout next season, George will have the perfect opportunity to bid farewell to Joe. If there is no parade down the canyon of heroes next fall, it's practically guaranteed that George will turn the team over to someone else.

The knock that many have against Mattingly is that he has never managed on any level before. The common perception being that you need experience as a manager in order to have credibility with the players. While that may be true if I were named manager of the Yankees, I don't think that Don Mattingly has a credibility issue with the Yankees. He merely has to point to his plaque in monument park and the retired number on his back if any of his players question his baseball pedigree. Let's not forget that Joe Torre started as the player/manager of the NY Mets. No one questioned his lack of managerial experience then (Of course the Mets were terrible and the pressure on the manager wasn't quite what it will be with the Yankees). The same thing was said about Wille Randolph's lack of experience, but he still managed to lead that Mets to the brink of the World Series this year. Donnie is one of the most beloved and respected former players in baseball. Their are more than a few current major leaguers who grew up idolizing him (Mark Texeria of the Rangers wears #23 as a tribute to him). He definitely would not have a credibility gap with his players.

I don't really subscribe to the theory that a manager can turn a bad team into a good one. Almost anyone who knows baseball would be able to make the decisions that most managers make. When to take out a pitcher, pinch hit, give a player a day off, hit and run, steal a base are all fairly logical decisions. There are more intuitive decisions which can turn a game around, but on the whole I don't think that a manager wins games for his team. The players do that. A manager can certainly lose some, however. Ultimately Donnie will be judged on wins and losses, but I don't think he'll have any problem with baseball strategy.

The keys to being successful in NY are being able to deal with George and being able to handle the crush of media. In NY everything is magnified. Every loss is the end of the world and every problem is the end of the world, every slump is the end of the world and losing to the Red Sox is the end of the universe. The reason that Joe Torre has been so successful (the $200 million in payroll didn't hurt) is that he doesn't seem to pay much attention to the doomsday theories. He just goes about his business in a very professional manner. His approach has served him well during his tenure. I have no idea how Donnie would handle himself as manager, but having a year under Joe will certainly help him understand the approach that Joe employs.

I'm not sure that it's a good thing for Donnie to take the job, but it looks like that is exactly what he's gong to do. Yogi Berra cut his ties with the Yankees for almost 20 years after George fired him as manager. Perhaps it's best for Yankee legends to just stay out of the mangers seat. Actually George has clearly mellowed in his old age because I certainly remember hitting coaches being fired after the team didn't hit in the post season. This was one of the best lineups of all time and they were silenced by the Tigers in the first round of the playoffs. I would dare say that if the hitting coach had been anyone other than Mattingly, they would have been looking for a new job by now.

Don Mattingly is my favorite Yankees player of all time. He always played hard and was one of the lone bright spots on some pretty terrible teams. He is a Yankee legend, in fact he's a baseball legend. In the updated Bill James Historical Abstract he writes this about Don Mattingly "100% ballplayer, 0% bullshit". I don't think that it could have been stated any better. The problem with being manager of the Yankees is that it's about 90% bullshit.

Knick of Time

The Knicks won their first game of the season last night. It's significant because it's Isiah Thomas' first win as head coach and it's first time the knicks have been above .500 in almost two years. It wasn't pretty though. They beat a depleted Grizzlies team by one point in a three overtime marathon. The Knicks somehow wasted a 19 point lead with less than 10 minutes to go in what looked like a flashback to the glory days of Larry Brown. The were saved by the solid play of Quinten Richardson (I find it very hard to write those words), and important contributions from David Lee and Nate Richardson off the bench.

So what to make of Thomas' debut. He got solid play out of Eddie Curry, which is more than Larry Brown could ever say. While Curry did turn the ball over five times, he also scored 17 and collected 14 rebounds. It would not be a stretch to say that the knicks would be happy with that kind of production every night. David Lee really provides a lot of energy and should see significantly more time that he did under Larry Brown last year, when he was sometimes inexplicably left out of the rotation. Steve Francis, on the other hand, was atrocious. He was 0-6 from the field, had five turnovers and scored a total of two points. I know that Francis used to be a good, if over rated player, but he seems to be totally lost. The fact that he is not the focus of the offense has turned him into a spectator on the court. The knicks would be much better off starting Jamal Crawford and bringing Francis off the bench to provide instant offense like Detroit did with Vinny Johnson back in the bad boy era. Francis probably wouldn't appreciate being demoted to coming off the bench, but sometimes you have to ruffle a few feathers to help the team. I'm not sure that Thomas, in his "player friendly" role, would be willing to make the change. Starbury had a decent night, but fouled out before the end of the second overtime period. In theory, he should really flourish under Isiah. He's got a less rigid system to play in and should have no complaints about the coaching this year. This really is his team on the floor and he's going to have the lead them. He may lead them straight to hell, but the rest of the team has no option but to follow.

The knicks head to Atlanta next, so there's a good chance that they will be 2-0 before they play their first game at the Garden. It will be nice for the Garden crowd to have a winning team to cheer for. The first home opponent are the Indiana Pacers who are not the title contending team that they used to be. The Knicks have a more than decent chance to open the season 3-0. The Spurs come into town after that and might lay all the "Knicks are back" talk to rest very quickly. The knicks are going to be better than they were last year. They have to be. I think I could coach the Knicks to more wins than Larry Brown did last year (If you're reading this James Dolan, I can be had at a bargain basement price). Thomas is on a short leash. Dolan has given him one year to turn this team around. With the Eastern conference in somewhat of a transition period, the Knicks should find the going a little easier this year. It's probably too much to expect a .500 season, but they might get close to 40 wins. Will that be enough for Dolan to keep Isiah around? It remains to be seen. The problem is that even if the Knicks do push 40 wins this year, I don't see how they get much better. They are still saddled with untradeable contracts and unless they get lucky in the draft, this is basically the team that they will have for the next couple of years. Of course there's always the prospect of another blockbuster trade for another huge salaried star (Kevin Garnett anybody), but with what they would have to give up (Channing Frye, David Lee), it probably wouldn't make the team any better.

The knicks will be at least 10 games better than they were last year. They will make a run at mediocrity, but is that what $100+ million buys you these days? Isiah has a lot to answer for. I can't wait for the end of the season when he starts spinning in the press about what a success the season was even though the team didn't make the playoffs. Should Knick fans have to settle for a 40 win team? Not for $100+ million they shouldn't, but that is about the most that can be expected. Isiah put this team together but unfortunately, the fans are going to have to live with it for years after he's gone.